I've neglected this space for far too long.

I tried writing a nice heartfelt post on my bday this year, but it fell through and was never published, because I got lazy.

I've got to start writing again, if I want to be in the media industry again. Also I've got some crazy assignments to do as Round 2 interviews. haha.

A few things have happened in the past few days. I felt many negative emotions, but the overwhelming support from friends, family, and fellow colleagues has made this journey a surprisingly heartfelt one. People who felt the exact same feelings I had when it happened too. So let's cut to the chase and start talking about what happened.

I was "terminated" due to a "restructuring of the company". They decided they didn't need a marketing department and that it was time for me to go. They told me on Monday evening, and even prepared the cheque for 4 weeks notice. They being the Management, aka the old boss and ladyboss. Not including my direct supervisor, the youngest son, and the older son. It was funny how they thought they could just get rid of me like that, thought I would sign and that would be my last day with them. Immediate termination with no proper closure, on the grounds of restructuring, not even for misconduct. 

This is the reason people hate this company. Its tyranny is just inconceivable. Of all the things they've done to previous employees; the constant bad mouthing, the putting down of their competitors, the horrible welfare for long service staff (why they remain there is beyond me and annoys me to no end), the way they lay off someone really takes the cake. Not to me though, because I know how to ensure I don't burn bridges. Because that's just not who I am. I may be pissed, but I wouldn't show that in blatant ways. I would use word of mouth; that's the most trustworthy source anw. (as opposed to listening to the company try to cover up their disgusting practices)

Aside from this, it was mentioned that my direct supervisor was not informed of this, that it was the management's decision, and "we have to follow what he says" (the old boss). This sounded so disrespectful to everyone in the company, that no one had a say in anything except for the old boss. It's scary to know one person determines what happens to everything and everyone in the company. But I insisted on speaking with my direct first. I had to give him the respect, even if I didn't feel that way. So I told them I would text him and see what he has to say. Then I left to perform a gig in Clarke Quay (which turned out pretty well!)

All through the night, I texted a whole bunch of people, asking what I should do. The one thing I thought long and hard about, is whether I should fight, go head on, speak my mind. But he told me to keep calm, whatever I say or do, never lose my temper. I asked about my benefits, my claims, my allowances, my ALs. My friends assured me that these are dependent on my contract. I packed that, and the handbook and slept at 3am. Knowing I was prepared for "battle".

The morning came and we had a conference call with the son who was out of country settling another business. So saddening to hear him say "ya, the management wants to restructure and close the marketing department, so i hope you understand". It was like a slap in my face, my hopes in getting some form of assurance from him was nowhere to be found. It hurt knowing he was simply following orders again, as he had always done. To push the blame to the management, no reasons, no explanations. fuck.

That's when I realised I was the only one who can protect myself. No one could back me up without getting into trouble themselves. So I told him I accepted it, I understood the circumstances of the company and the trying time now. However, I had some nitty gritty details to get into then, starting with my mobile allowance. Delving straight into money talk, what was the point of trying to save face at this time? They want to get rid of me, sure. I would be more than willing to go, if you return all that you owe me.

Specifically told him how the mobile allowance should be "$100" and not "up to $100", which was claimed by him. He interjected me going "ya, but you dont use $100, then you shouldn't be claiming so much!" exasperation clear in his tone. I very amicably said "I am just telling you what is written in the contract, I'm not saying that's what I want, I have agreed with your verbally for my mobile allowance to be via claims, however, I have yet to receive the last 3 months worth of mobile claims" to which the Ladyboss interjected saying "if you want the $300, we can give you, money is no issue, if you want to be calculative about the $300, then we will give it to you!" (annoyance in her tone too) I replied very calmly again, addressing her, telling her I'm not asking for this, I am okay with just going with the mobile claims as per my mobile bills, I'm not trying to be calculative, I'm not here to burn bridges. I still need you guys as my reference. (immediate light in her eyes when I said that) She went "oh ya, for your next job, you need us to give you reference" "exactly, I will need you so I'm okay with this all, I know the company is not doing well, and I understand, I just need to know that everything is proper, so I can send out follow up emails etc to leave properly" 

I had no intention to ever ask them to be my reference, but they didn't need to know that. It was just for them to know I wasn't trying to go against them, and that our working relationship was still important to me. 

And suddenly they softened their tactics. What they thought was going to be a tough time getting me out, turned out to be a much smoother process. They agreed to do everything properly, calculate properly, giving me my payslips, calculating my balance AL, and once everything was done, that I would sign the letter and fuck off.

But then another blow came around. They refused to pay me for the 4 ALs that I had left. Claiming they've "never done encashment for AL" as per the handbook, which states "unused AL is strictly non-transferable or entitled to any encashment" However in the contract, it states "pro rated paid leave is computed in proportion to the number of the completed months of service in the year". The HR even said "why don't you use it up first?" Wtf how to use if you want me to leave today? hahaha. I told her "what I signed is the contract, and not the handbook. The handbook is used as a reference, not the legally binding document". Ladyboss kept insisting "we've never done this, see whether you are okay to not get the 4 days pay, because we cannot do this for you, then the other employees will request for this when they leave too, we cannot let you go with this then they use you as example and ask for it too" 

This is a ridiculous reason and makes me annoyed for a very different reason. Because, firstly, you're saying I'm making things difficult for you, when you are the ones who are not going with the rules of MOM. Secondly, it just means you've taken advantage others' ignorance, without even realising that it's not right. I say ignorance because they don't know better, about the systems in place that protect the employees. But I do.

I told them these 4 days are worth more than $500, not inclusive of the CPF yet. This is not a small amount of money. I cannot allow myself to be okay with not getting this amount of money. HR whispers to me "you know what you're doing right?" which was a word of caution because she knows what the ladyboss is capable of, and because she's the older son's wife and we've had decent conversations with each other. However, in this circumstance, it was hard to know whose side she was on, protecting the employee who she knows was unceremoniously terminated, or her mother-in-law and the company she might someday own. 

I looked at her and said "is that a threat?"

and she retracts her statement "no it's not, I just hope you know what you're doing" right... She excuses herself and comes back later saying "I've called MOM, they say since you are earning more than 2.5k, you are not covered under the Employment Act IV, so if we want, then we will have to hire a lawyer." Ladyboss goes "I think don't need lawyer la. Just whether or not you accept that we don't pay the 4 days" Seriously? So there's no way that this outcome would benefit me? What is going on in her head..

All the while I'm texting friends, even a headhunter about HR issues, and what I can expect, what I can claim back that is rightfully mine. And even though I know I was right, it would not have ended in a way that benefits me. I made the decision then "Okay, I tell you what, we do a give and take, since I have 4 days, you just pay me for 2 days, so I give you back 2 days". Surprisingly, the Ladyboss immediately goes "okay, settle, go ahead and change the cheque, we will pay you the 2 days. But this is only for Bernice, special case, no one else can give this, and we need to see if we have to change the contract..." ha.

I walk out the meeting room, getting a thumbs up from the accounts, who later texted me saying "you are a clever girl" HAHA. she's a sweet lady. I like her even if she called me "mei xian" for a few months. hahah.

Eventually, I signed the letter, and got the cheques. They decided to give me the $300 for mobile allowance instead of the bill claims, (thanked them profusely), and everything else. The difference between the original cheque and the amended one after I fought for everything, was $600. That's the amount of money I spent in BKK, a whole holiday. 

I sent out very PC emails stating my last day as well as follow ups. I spoke with people and told them how it turned out. I told them I was okay, that I was already in the process of finding another job, so this was a blessing in disguise. Then I left.

How much I've grown over the course of a few years. I left amicably, thanked them for giving me the opportunity for the fun we had. Then I went to find grandma, because she makes me feel better, joking with her and listening to her stories. 

Then I got a call from the salesman I was close to, the one who shared stories with me. He said the ladyboss told him not to hear what I had to say, and to watch if I posted anything nasty about the company on Facebook. They just never learn, it's sad. 

I had high aspirations when I worked there. I was told they were going to use my writing skills and expertise. They had so many ideas and plans, but they all fell through. Incompetence? Lack of responsibility? Lack of leadership? But ultimately, lack of power. 

The greatest take away from this experience, was that I need to use the probation period more wisely. There were so many red flags coming up, I was just too stubborn to do something about it. I finally teared today. I felt the weight on my shoulders being lifted after that. I don't feel anger anymore. Everyone knows how ridiculous this episode was. (I think it's pretty obvious) I still have some ammunition, but I doubt I'll use it, not unless they continue bad mouthing me. (I hope they don't)

Until then, the search continues to find a job that I fit well in and I am happy working long hours and hard for.

i'm sorry. but i'm not about to let you in on my embarrassing past. too bad if you missed the entries! heh heh hehhhh